You order, I deliver.
Here’s the long awaited Revival review.
As you can tell this was a pretty requested review. There were more people asking for this but you guys get the point. Now many selenators must be rolling their eyes right about now thinking “of course she’s going to trash every song” but that’s not true my dears. Everyone knows esmg is not biased and I have said before on record that Selena’s music isn’t complete trash. She actually has some nice songs.
Now let’s get started!
In the beginning it sounds like a frog croaking (this was actually my first thought) but then it hits into this beat that’s going on for about 40 seconds. I feel like everyone forgets about this song even though the album is called….. Revival. I’ve listened to this song a couple of times and I still can’t remember how it goes! This song has a lot going on through the chorus and it’s just an ongoing mess. The song in general has many different beat changes and you feel like you’re listening to three different songs all together.
“This is my time to butterfly”
2. Kill Em with Kindness
This is the type of song I’d listen to on a summer night in the car with all the windows down. The beat is very fun and refreshing and it surprisingly doesn’t irritate you with the constant repeating of “kill em with kindness.” It actually makes you wanna dance! Overall it’s a bop and the lyrics aren’t as pointless as they usually are in upbeat pop songs. Are they ironic for Selena to be preaching about though? For sure.
3. Hands to Myself
Have you ever listened to a song and the beginning is so good and then it ends up sounding annoying and way too poppy? That song is Hands to Myself. I don’t like this beat it makes me feel weird and I especially don’t like the “I mean i could but why would i want too?” and not just because it’s followed by that annoying generic beat. I don’t hate this song… I just don’t really like it.
“All of the downs and the uppers
Keep making love to each other
And I’m trying, trying, I’m trying, but I can’t keep my hands to myself”
4. Same Old Love
When I’m listening to this song, it feels like I’ve died and gone to song heaven! This is an amazing song. This why people bought the album. Everything about it from the beat to the lyrics to the beat drop. Snatched.
5. Good For You
The word bop was invented for this song. I’m aboutta forgive Selena for all her sins just to keep listening to this song. The beat is on point and it makes you wanna wear a dress and start dancing. A$AP Rocky’s part in this song is amazing and fits very well with this song. He carries it out into the next part perfectly.
“I just wanna look good for you good for you uh-huh”
This is a very peaceful song. You listen to it and you just imagine someone in a car looking outside the window after some life crisis.
No? Just me? It’s actually very nice when Selena isn’t screaming in my ear with five different beat drops behind her.
Speaking of screaming…
At first this song starts off sounding like a foreign KPOP remix but then you get into it. The chorus is ear piercing and she’s screaming in my ear, but for some weird reason I still listen to this song! It’s like I sacrifice something when I listen to this song, in this case it’s my ears.
“You don’t know how to love me when you’re sooooobeerrrr”
8. Me & the Rhythm
This song starts off and I’m already annoyed. If I had to describe the feeling I get listening to this song, I’d say it’s the feeling you get when you’ve been shopping for six hours straight and your friend still wants to keep going and is trying on different outfits while your legs hurt and you’re wishing to be home in bed but you’re still in the stuck in the store, listening to this horrible song. yikes! too mean? Anyway only stores like H&M and Forever 21 would be playing songs like this at 11pm.
I can’t imagine someone listening to this song and actually liking it. The beginning sounds nice but then everything falls apart after the lyric “So now what’s mine is ours” This song is just annoying and very forgetful. With the way Selena sings and the beat of this song, it sounds like a remix everyone hates. The notes get dragged on and it sounds like something off Stars Dance.
I’m sorry, I know how much she likes pretending she never made that album.
10. Body Heat
This song starts off very fiery and sultry and you’re all like “yas selena!” but then you get hit with this beat and everything happens so quickly you feel like you just took a dose of heroine. She continues to say the same thing throughout this whole song with the same overused beat. Now now.. I like this song don’t get me wrong. However, it’s a little messy, but it’s a fun…mess? This song can only be enjoyable on the dance floor and it’s that song the DJ plays that ends up wearing you out.
Ahh this……religious bop..? This was actually my favorite song off this album for a little while. Felt like it was the only song where I wasn’t in the middle of a street during hurricane. It’s very calming and it makes you want to wear a white dress with a flower crown on.
Only sel makes me feel this way!
“Like the air you can
Rise from the rubble with your mind, you can hover
You can rise like the tide, like the heat it in the summer
Yes, I know there are those who will wanna bring you down
But you can rise with your mind and make your higher power proud
Like the air you can rise”
12. Me and My Girls
At first listen, you feel like this is a song you’ve already heard before and that’s kind of how you feel throughout the whole song but there’s no doubt that this song is a banger. I personally don’t think you can listen to this song with headphones on and walk down the street. The song is like one big party in your ears which will just end up giving you a headache. Still a banger tho!
“You don’t understand i don’t need a man.”
She starts off and she’s describing some lover without any visible parts. It’s probably another religious song
ironic since she actua– moving on. This song has a peaceful atmosphere around it and her voice is very soft in this. It’s a cute song. I’ll ignore the similarities and ripoff from the chorus of The Pussycat Dolls’ song Stickwitu though!
Perfect has a really nice slow beat mixed with some R&B. To be completely honest, this song is kinda depressing. Selena’s voice actually sounds really good in this and she isn’t struggling as much with the long notes.
Good thing this isn’t a live version! The quality of this song is nice and the beat has me going to sleep. Listening to this song will make you want to kill Justin Bieber because it gives the impression that he destroyed her in the relationship. Selena, queen of being manipulative since that was really her role in the relationship!
“Maybe i should be more like her”
15. Outta My Hands (Loco)
The beat starts off with some odd sound accompanied with nostalgic lyrics. The lyric can only be described as someone strangling you. Selena is not new to excessive auto-tune but her voice in the chorus literally sounds like someone altered the pitch on youtube to avoid copyright. She’s loco for allowing this tragedy on the album.
The starting music is very calming, but the song itself is lacking character and emotion mainly because Selena is trying to be something she’s not and that is a singer. Okay Selena sweetie I hear you trying to belt out those notes in the chorus, but please, calm down. The lyrics are nice. The “singer?” Yeah not so much. The song is very boring and after listening to it, you still won’t remember how it goes.
Out of 16 songs, Selena co-wrote 10 which is actually a huge upgrade for her considering she co-wrote like 3 songs in her career discography before this album. Since we’re on the topic of writing credits, no Selena did not write Sober and no Selena did not write Perfect. So please, to her headass fans reading this, stop using that as receipts that Justin “cheated” on her and emotionally abused her. Matter of a fact, none of the songs that indicate a harsh relationship were written by Selena! Oh and btw, Selena lied about writing Perfect so for the REAL writers, Julia Michaels, Felix Snow, and Justin Tranter, on behalf of the exposingsmg tea, please sue Selena Gomez.
But good job Selena for actually co-writing the other 10 songs!
Lead Single Performance
*cackles* Oh yes we all know what’s coming. The bitter truth.
Selena performed Good For You on Le Grand Journal in 2015, which was one of the very first performances of the song.
Wow where can I start? If Selena put on a good performance, I will say she did. I’m not scared to admit the truth and if we were talking about her 2015 AMA performance of Same Old Love, then maybe you’d rather read that, but we are talking about this lead single performance in particular.
Good For You is not a hard song to perform. Matter of a fact, you can literally whisper the entire song and you will sound like Selena. However, Selena’s mic was like 32% on, she had a backup singer which was heard more than her, and on top of that she had the backing track. So did we really hear SELENA? Not really, but this is nothing new since Selena often resorts to those methods considering she doesn’t have that much vocal ability unless you’re asking her about Justin.
Since you can’t dance to Good For You, she just stood there as if her feet were nailed to the ground. Yes she did not move and the one time she did, she looked like her soul was being vacuumed out of her body.
So she was serving no vocals. No stage presence. The only thing she was serving was the exorcism.
There was also another moment in the performance where it looked like the devil who struck her in that moment, was staring right through me.
I get wanting to connect with the audience, but please stop trying to connect me with another devil.
I don’t have anything else to say about this performance except uh…her dress was cute?
At least she can count on her looks (sometimes).
Performance: 1 out of 5 stars
PR or Damage Control
Ah yes, my favorite topic.
I’ve exposed all PR and damage control taken throughout the course of Selena’s career so I’ll link you to some of her most notable PRs because that’s what she’s known for after her oh so beautiful selfies.
Some posts on Selena’s damage control…
As for PR or damage control taken before beginning the Revival era, that was explained in depth in The Lupus Coverup Story as well as in the short video linked below:
Basically, Selena has been addicted to drugs which forced her to cancel the remainder of both the Stars Dance Tour and the Revival Tour. Her team came up with this grand plan called LUPUS, in which Selena blames her issue on the 8% of the disease she might carry. Her lupus was oh so severe which is why she continuined triggering the disease by tanning, smoking, drinking, etc., to treat the the invisible disease that almost killed her by giving her a stroke. Oh she also mistakened that disease for cancer and went on to get chemotherapy which definitely showed when she was losing so much hair whilst promoting a hair brand called, Pantene! She didn’t show any symptoms because she is invincible and is defying the odds. But let’s give Selena our prayers and buy Revival!
On top of that, whenever Selena would fuck up, Justin was brought up in the story so he can be attached with her, give her some good headlines, and if there’s any news of Selena being her true self, a bitter druggie, we can just blame it on Justin’s influence on her later on.
You can’t tell me you guys forget about Selena’s last Jelena reunion in November 2015 before both their AMA performances when Selena was finally doing some promotion for Revival.
Let’s not forget about the posed photos at the restaurant.
If you can’t see right through the transparency… then wow, sucks for you!
Final thoughts: Revival was definitely an upgrade for Selena musically, lyrically, and even time wise considering she was more involved in the making of this album more than any other album. The album was for sure more mature and gave us this very sweet and desirable side of Selena that we all know is an act, but the general public rightfully fed into it. She delivered some great bops as well as some boring and repetitive ones. I’ll forgive her for the times I wanted to stab myself with some of the headache she brought in some of the songs because I’m pretty sure I’ve made Selena and her fans want to stab themselves after reading this blog at one point or another. Because of the glo up on this album, we’ll go easy.
3 out of 5 stars.
I’m aware she’s Mexican.
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